Zahra and I worked together to make a stretched sentence along with DRAFT. We were learning to use DRAFT and the 5w's. The 5w's was for the stretching part, and then we used draft for the editing. Here is a Original and Drafted sentence.
Original
LI: To write a stretched sentence
Who - The silver scaled fish
What - Was being chased by an enormous shark
When - In the afternoon
Where - In the ocean
Why - Because the shark was hungry
In the afternoon, the silver scaled fish was being chased by an enormous shark in the ocean because the shark was hungry.
Drafted
LI: To write a stretched sentence
Who - The silver scaled fish
What - was being chased by an enormous shark
When - In the deep dark ocean
Where - In the ocean
Why - Because the shark was hungry
In the deep dark ocean, the silver scaled fish was being chased by an enormous shark in the deep ocean, desperately wanting to catch his prey for it was hungry.
1 comments:
Well done Harry and Zhara. You have transformed your sentences into powerful sentences! Using the 5Ws and DRAFT helps to make your writing much more interesting. Your sentences paint a clear picture in my mind.
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